Are you outgoing, want to drive across country in search of adventure and most of all ooze enthusiasm about processed pork products?

If you’re itching to tour America in a van shaped like a hot dog, then send Kraft Heinz an application to drive one of its very own Oscar Mayer Wienermobiles full-time.  

It turns out the purveyor of lunch meats needs creative souls to get behind the wheel for a one-year assignment, going from one state to the next to attend high-profile events and coordinate press on its behalf. 

But the demanding job is not for everyone, so Oscar Meyer wants to know “do you cut the mustard?

Who can apply?

Due to numerous image problems for salted and cured sausage meats, not everyone with a burning affection for eating their own body weight in hot dogs can qualify to drive a wiener-shaped motor vehicle for others’ amusement.

Oscar Meyer has a very specific group of applicants it wants to attract—preferred are the kind of vibrant youngsters just graduating from college that possess a proven ability to convey stories that resonate with consumers.

“Applicants should have a BA or BS, preferably in public relations, journalism, communications, advertising, or marketing,” it states in its ad.

Only those candidates are ideally placed to reignite America’s love for wiener dogs that were once as ubiquitous as baseball and apple pie.

What exactly does it pay?

Good question. Unfortunately details on the salary are just as much a mystery as what precisely is fed through Oscar Meyer’s industrial-scale meat grinders. 

According to the job ad, the pay is “competitive”, which is about as descriptive as the “mechanically separated chicken and pork” listed in its hot dogs’ ingredients.

What other advantages are there?

There are some tasty perks, though: expenses incurred during the job are covered by the company, unspecified benefits are listed (unlimited supply of frankfurters?) and those lucky enough to become official “Hotdoggers” also get to wear Oscar Mayer team apparel. At no extra charge, either: they’re provided free, according to the ad.

Most importantly, however, Oscar Mayer promises each one of its elite hot dog promoters will become something of a “mini-celebrity in small towns and big cities” as they attend various events and sit down for interviews with the media.

What kind of professional experience awaits?

Oscar Meyer says Wienermobile drivers will gain experience in a self-managed position with “many responsibilities”. 

These include but are not limited to being your own traveling public relations firm, as well as pitching TV, radio and print reporters for a chance to preach the Oscar Meyer story. 

It’s also expected that those few piloting its fleet of Wienermobiles contribute to the company’s branded social content. Currently, Oscar Mayer has over 40,000 subscribers to Twitter and Instagram, for example, and no doubt the top dogs at Kraft Heinz headquarters will expect those numbers to rise. 

How many can hope to drive the Wienermobile?

There are only six Wienermobiles touring the country at all times, according to the company.

And candidates must hurry to apply, because time is running out. The deadline for application is January 31st.

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